The Dead Butterfly Story

I just came back from a 17 day trip to the Bahamas. The whole run down of this trip in episode 218 of the podcast here, you can listen to it so you have the background.

I got home late Saturday night. As I woke up the next morning, naturally my brain was looking for the ocean, but it wasn't there. I decided to go for a walk, to adapt myself back to the beautiful nature here that we have in Ontario...the green luscious trees definitely is beauty we have here that isn't as present in Bahamas.

As I walked out the front door, there it was. A beautiful monarch butterfly, upside down, dead. It startled me. I left it. I really didn't know what to do because signs and syncs are huge for me. I get signs from the Universe all the time. I usually see butterflies in beautiful moments. For me butterflies have always represented transformation for me. So a dead butterfly of course startled me. My brain went to, is someone going to die? Am I having an anti-transformation? I was really confused.

So I did what I usually do when spirit signs show up....I leave voice texts for my spiritual friends...those that get downloads like I do, some who are channeling much more than I do...my trusted sources as well where they won't think I am cray-cray. And I laugh when I leave voice texts...like "what the heck is happening" lol, kind of messages.

Here is some of the feedback I received and then I paid attention to what landed:

-when something dies, there is new life

-the butterfly was the transformed being....so post transformation, some part of you is being put to rest, is not coming with you through your next transformation

-you have come back from this 17 day trip, nothing will ever be the same again

-you may be getting offers, opportunities, ideas...you don't have to say yes to all of them. Be discerning with what you say yes to as you enter your next transformation.

-butterflies are beautiful, creative, there is a mirror here for me.

This is the coles notes of the convos....but the nutshell. How I allow all this to sink in is, I walk. I went walking in nature....and allowed the Universe, my spirit guides to come in....to drop any ideas in that I could 'feel' into. And one dropped in...

What am I putting to rest that will not come with me as I move forward?

You see, I have had a massive up-levelling of my inner energetics...the way I think, act, speak and react and show up in my life through my business...entrepreneurship is truly a self development journey or I'd say, a soul development journey (if you allow it to be). And I allow allow allow it all. I am always open to the next level of growth...always. It's not always easy but it's so freakin fun on the other side of growth.

I have this ease now speaking on stages, speaking on camera, sharing my views and perspectives here, on my podcast, in person. I don't hide myself anymore. I show myself fully as best as I can. I know who I am and know what I am here to share with the world...I know I am worthy of all and know I have a spiritual role that I am just working on fulfiling always through my coaching and online presence and in person events...I have women to support, impact, cheer on and so I am on it.....I have reached this next level of not caring what people think and realizing that when I actually do what I want to do, not what I am expected to do and be my truest version of myself....I manifest all of the reality I dream of...and attract the best people...as my people can only find me when I am being my truest self...not when I am trying to fit in a box....and it comes through in my health, relationships, wealth, business, experiences, opportunities etc.

What hit me....was this....what I am putting to rest is all the inconsistencies I have had with a few parts of my life and business.....two stand out...one I will share here and the second to be shared later....they are my physical health and a movement I declared I was starting called "Speak Up". I have downplayed this desire I have to help women speak up more....it's a big freakin deal to me and something opened up this week about this 'speak up' movement...but what really hit me personally this week for me was....

My physical health. I am a bit embarrassed to share this as many of you know that I was a personal trainer and ran a fitness and nutrition business 15 years ago in my early 40s. But as I stopped that business, and started coaching and doing deeper spiritual and hypnosis work for my clients....pandemic hit, I turned 50, the middle of menopause to now being in full menopause...the food, the routine, the drink choices changed, hot flashes started and here I am not feeling my best in my body everyday. I have done a lot of work on loving my body as it is now and from that love, doing good for my body, making better choices, food prepping, hydrating more, getting back to the weights etc....but no longer in an extreme way. I always did extremes to stay in shape after I stopped teaching...the beauty of teaching fitness is I was always focused on the workouts and food wellness because I was teaching it...it was my main priority. But new priorities creeped in during menopause which was also the pandemic, one major one was doing hypnosis for many many people who were struggling so I put my physical health to the side to help more people..every hour in the day mattered and rest became my priority in that season of life....since then I have been on this up and down journey with my routines...and truly I can feel it when I am writing this...my body intelligence is saying "Binu it is time!". No one will look at me and think my body isn't good..it's all so personal...I know how I feel in my stomach, my gut, how my leg strength feels....my cardiovascular system....we all know our own bodies and what it feels like to thrive more internally...that's what I am after....it's not about sizes or clothing sizes, it's about feeling my absolute best.

I have worked hard the last few years on my spiritual growth, my inner self-knowing, my business development, my thoughts, beliefs, my vision, my mind around money, my relationships in my home. I have been consistent with showing up in all of these areas of my life...but my workouts have slipped...my protein has been inconsistent. I have worked with a health coach on and off and do about 70% of the work but have never really gone all in. My body work has not been given the priority. And I can feel it. I have been consistent, but inconsistently, you know what I am saying? I like to workout and eat well...but I fall out of it after a few weeks....the inconsistency has caught up with me...no judgement here, just awareness. And I get to choose what I want right for my life...and longevity and strength and overall wellbeing is calling me now.

So I pondered...as I was like "okay that's it...I am being called to be more consistent with my physical health?". I almost felt like the butterfly was a bigger sign haha. So funny what our brain does.

THEN.....

Four days later, I was sitting in the backyard by myself and my son comes out, he had just woken up and came out to chat. He is 21 and just home for the last two weeks of summer before heads back to University. We were facing each other. He pauses and says "Mom look at that butterfly...". I turned around and there was a black butterfly with blue tips on the bottom sitting on our white umbrella. The umbrella was closed so the butterfly was in plain sight. For real, we never see butterflies in our back yard. It was alive and beautiful and still. He started telling me he saw the dead one on our porch and so I told him the whole story of what I had happening in my head all week. Then I paused and thought...wait, what were we just talking about before you saw that butterfly. We were talking about my physical workouts. My son is super athletic and super fit and goes to the gym almost everyday....and so I often talk to him about my workout plan as he helps to keep me motivated and he always cheers me on...so I know he will be on my hype team in this department. 

Often if you are trying to discern a spirit sign, as I help many of my clients do that....I would ask them what they were thinking or talking about when that sign showed up. In that moment, it hit me ....and I felt these sensations through my whole body...it's time...to make my workouts and my physical health a priority...a non-negotiable...I have said this many times before and it has not stuck, but my lens is so different now. I can feel it. And what I am building is a sustainable 365 plan. Not a 2 weeks once summer is over. It's a NOW plan that allows me to feel my best. As when I do keep to my health and fitness routine...I always feel FANTASTIC...even more than that...I feel ABSOLUTELY INCREDIBLE...and I want to HOLD that energy now...there is so much here underneath the surface for us humans, women...of why we don't keep the habit going....alot of this is in the nervous system work and then it's making it the priority before the other things I want to do each day....I am starting some new inner work now too, the visualization, the how I speak to my own brain each morning as it pertains to my choices...and in my mind, body and soul and incredible ideas and downloads come to me in my workouts or post workout every time. More of that please.

The other big piece for me....is the energy that is here with my body...I always talk about health and wealth being ONE energy...so the butterfly said to me, 'to go to your next level, this is what you are being called forward to focus on now'. It makes sense. My inconsistent health routines have gotten me here. I workout, I eat pretty well, I hydrate and focus on my sleep about 70-75% effort. A month before events I ramp up my routine...and then I let the other great things I want to do get in the way.... It's time to ramp it up to over 85% effort.

I think of Brendon Burchard often. He talks about the importance of his physical strength and stamina and wellness to be able to stand on stages for the hours that he does and teach his audiences. I feel like this is what I am being called forward to next. 

Now as I discern for myself...I know there is more to the butterfly story...and my SPEAK UP movement....the 'beauty and creative' message is for another blog....but for now this is it.

Stay tuned....as things evolved in my life and business, I will happily take you for the ride.

I know there is more to this butterfly experience...so let's see what unfolds....

With love and light always,

Binu

ps. you have something to share about butterflies, for me or for you, drop me an email or dm anytime, I always love to talk about spirit signs!